I just let Jean Claude off th back porch. I was in the kitchen cooking and he went out to the porch pantry to play with some fake garland I got out of the garage for CCL’s house. Of course I forg0t he was out there and after I got my cooking supplies closed the porch door. But he’s back in the house now. JC and Roxie always enjoy the Christmas holiday. They like the decorations and the music especially, Roxie. Last night I saw them cuddled together on the sofa just watching the Christmas lights. Just quietly watching. Today I had Bing Crosby singing “White Christmas” on the Ipod. Both cats sat perfectly still just relaxing. .
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For years I’ve identified as an “I” on the Briggs Myers Personality Scale but I also realize that I’m given to too some self centeredness and a need to be alone. Still, after a brief period of solititude and not welcoming people and places into my life I feel myself coming back. Once again I am reaching out to people and things that I had pushed away or left in the background. The late author Merle Shain was a Canadian author I heard years ago do an interview with Larry King on his radio show . Shain wrote in her book “When Lovers Are Friends ” that loneliness is something you do to yourself. It has taken me years to understand that concept. Lately I’ve watched my married friends more closely. Some really do seem to like each other. Some barely tolerate each other. I watched this weekend as a married friend expressed her loneliness and bitterness in small, hostile ways to those attending a party at my house. I realize it was not my job to save her. She knew better than I…but not enough to take the “I” out of her equation . It seemed to me that that her husband not “acting” right was not the key to her misery but her own inability to love herself. Love is something that must be expressed and revealed to others with no conditions, otherwise it is anything but love. I also realize that folks ought to like each other too in romantic partnerships. Jean Claude and Roxie, a boy and a girl, are the best of friends. They like their alone time and they give each other space to go and grow. They also have different tastes – Jean Claude likes boxes and furry sticks. Roxie likes laser toys and Mariah Carey. Yet they have points of commonality such as filtered water and scratching post boxes. They show affection for each other often but often let each other just be – without judgement or fear of loneliness.
Some people are always searching, always asking for more. Never content. Never grateful for what they do have — for them peace is not option. I am, I admit, a bit of drama queen myself. Roxie, of course, is a drama queen. But we have our moments of rest and relaxation.
Ok. so I went on a road trip to Atlantic City for business with two of my colleagues, wonderful people. We stayed at the Trump Taj Mahal. No, I don’t recommend it. The check-in is the worse I’ve in 30 years of travelling. Rooms are ok though and I had a view of the beach. The best view is watching folks….the Atlantic City boardwalk has the best people watching in the world. The Trump Tower is connected to a nightclub …the Casbah, ala the 1938 film “Algiers’ with actors Charles Boyer and Hedy Lamar. You can access the club off the boardwalk. One of my colleague told me about a group of cats that hang out underneath the boardwalk. She said they seem domesticated – got me thinking maybe Roxie and Jean Claude (who enjoy people watching from my back porch) might like a road trip.