Author Archives: catzandalldatz

Looking beyond

Push! Dig deep! These are words you hear when someone is helping someone push. But what does that have to be with looking beyond? Well, first, look beyond what you see. For example, Azeena posted about Jean-Claude turning on the bathroom faucet. Well, what Azeena didn’t know was that I have become JC’s personal water butler. Whenever I walk past the bathroom he jumps in the tub and demands that I turn on the faucet for him. And don’t worry, we clean out the tub very well.

The other night I caught him sleeping in the tub. I guess he felt like this would ensure he would always get water! But what does this mean? It means that what you see might not always be the case for what’s happening. JC wasn’t turning on the faucet, it was me.

One data point does not a straight line make.

My only resolution is to try to think of things in a positive light. If you have one interaction with someone, a waitress that is rude, someone in a rush, instead of taking the negative view, I’m going to take the positive. Maybe they had a fight with their boyfriend or maybe there is a sick relative in the car. I tell you that this takes work and requires me to push and dig deep. Our first reaction is that people do things to us rather than responding based on their own experiences.

Just as it requires two points to make a line, it requires more than just a single encounter to fully understand someone.*
*Please note the one example to this is online dating. If someone sends you a message that is crass, rude, disrespectful immediately respond accordingly. Don’t ask me why this is but just trust me 🙂

Thinking positively is far more difficult than I thought it would be. But I continue to push! and dig deep!

The Joys of Living Together

I grew up as an only child. This means that I can spend oodles of time by myself. In fact, I crave it. I once dated a guy who came from a large family and constantly needed to be around a lot of people. You can imagine how long that relationship lasted.

For the past month or so, I’ve been in a transition state. Most people are not comfortable with an extended transition state. It feels squishy. You don’t know when things will be resolved. It’s constantly fluid but solid. I’m ok with my transition state. Consulting as a profession could be defined as doing ambiguous things for an unknown client for an indeterminate amount of time. Here is the secret to accepting transition – just accept it. It’s hard to let go of the past but in that transition state is where your future lies.

By staying flexible and knowing that anything can change, when it does you aren’t surprised. Instead you just move in step with whatever path you’ve been guided.

Cats are ambiguous creatures as well. Some easily adjust to transition but others begin to act out. As our cats have always been two household cats, they’ve learned to adjust to whatever happens. But here are some tips for cats, and their owners, to adjust to transition:

1) No matter where you are, you can mark out your space, however small
2) Find something, someone or someplace you can go to center yourself
3) Do not be afraid to discuss how you are feeling in your transition
4) limit your transitions – you aren’t going to quit smoking, give up Chick-Fil-a and train for the marathon all at once. Pace yourself
5) Open yourself to whatever happens is what is supposed to happen; control is an illusion

What other tips do you have for transitioning in your life?

Please take a moment to support the Washington Humane Society

Please take a moment to support the Washington Humane Society

Simply by purchasing a bag of Ziploc bags or trash bags or detergent, you can help out the Washington Humane Society!

Traveling as a Traveler

People everywhere take vacations. They travel down the street, across town, across state, across country, across oceans and soon across galaxies. Yet, many of these people will remain tourists and never become a traveler.

There is nothing wrong with being a tourist. You get to go cool places, see beautiful monuments and have great experiences.

But what is the difference between the two?

A traveler lets the travel experience change them. They seek out the travel in order to stretch themselves, try new things even while being a tourist. They go to the top of the Eiffel tower not to just see it, but to understand why the French wanted it torn down and why it was supposed to be temporary. They seek not to just pose in pictures but to let the picture become their life for a brief period.

Cats are travelers. This is evidenced by the difference in behaviors between the houses of CCL and Azeena. JC for example demands backyard access daily at Azeena’s house. At CCL, he demands he evening ration of Fancy Feast with Cheddar. Roxie used to have entirely different behaviors as well. At CCL she would frequently wake CCL up in the middle of the night. Azeena enjoyed peaceful nights but crazy mornings.

In every case the cats let themselves absorb the personality of the house owner.

We have a fixed core, but we can let those experiences while traveling, even just around the block, change us. Let us absorb them. Really try to see the world from their point of view. Why do they think differently? And you will too…

Go with the flow

Cats are amazing creatures. They adapt to the craziest of circumstances with grace. Humans not so much. We fear change and most of us don’t do well in new situations. However maybe if we believed we would always land on our feet we would handle any change with grace as well.  I’m currently on my own completely following my instinct. This means changes from day to day but I’m doing what feels right to me and no one else.